Sunday, November 29, 2009

Claigh's December Column

The Power of a Grateful Heart
Claigh H. Jensen, LCSW

Peace on earth, goodwill to men. In these troubled times, how can you be filled with a sense of peace and goodwill? Research has found that living gratefully changes everything! Choosing gratitude is choosing the abundant life.

The great Roman philosopher Cicero wrote, "Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others." In Webster's 1828 Dictionary we read, "Gratitude is a virtue of the highest excellence, as it implies a feeling and generous heart, and a proper sense of duty."

In the "Research Project on Gratitude and Thankfulness," co-investigators Robert A. Emmons, of the University of California at Davis, and Michael E. McCullough, of the University of Miami found that living gratefully improves several aspects of an individual life. They discovered people who live gratefully enjoy greater vitality and life satisfaction. The grateful were also found to exhibit positive emotions, empathy, generosity, and optimism. Physically they tended to sleep better, have lower blood pressure and were more likely to exercise and take care of their health.

Interestingly, Emmons and McCullough found the cynical view suggesting positive people either deny or ignore problems to be unfounded. Indeed, "grateful people do not deny or ignore the negative aspects of life." In reality gratitude energizes and helps one see possibilities and solutions to challenges. Rather than being overwhelmed, a person with a grateful heart finds increased energy to overcome!

Dr Sapna Parikh recently reported on MYFOXNY.COM, "Research shows that gratitude really does bring you good health and happiness. . . . One study . . . found that people who are grateful are less resentful and less envious."

There are some specific actions you can incorporate to develop or improve the virtue of gratitude:

First, believe you can change and improve. Decide that living gratefully is possible regardless of your circumstance. Recognize that life is filled with many opportunities for growth. It is important to take responsibility for your attitude towards people and the world around you.

Second, let go of the negative thoughts that may be a part of your current thinking pattern. Forgive yourself or others if needed and let the past go. If appropriate, ask for forgiveness. Move forward.

Third, keep a gratitude journal. I have found that keeping a handwritten journal filled with the things I am grateful for improves my sense of well-being. On difficult days, reviewing what I have written previously reminds me of how blessed I really am. You may want to consider an online gratitude journalling group that allows you to share in the written thoughts of others. The energy in grateful expression is contagious!

Fourth, be aware of others and take note of their efforts to give. Express your thanks and appreciation when someone does something for you. Help your children and grandchildren improve their social skills and like-ability by teaching them to live thankfully and to express their gratitude. Peers are drawn to those with the positive energy created by grateful living. The one who can see the good in others and knows how to articulate it spreads the warmth of appreciation.

Fifth, if you have been neglecting your spiritual life, consider returning to your faith home. McCullough, Emmons and Tsang found "Those who regularly attend religious services and engage in religious activities such as prayer [and] reading religious material . . . are more likely to be grateful." While it is not necessary to attend church to develop the virtue of gratitude, apparently it helps. Gratitude is the root of spirituality.

President John F. Kennedy once stated, "As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." The power you unleash as you determine to live gratefully will improve your physical and emotional health. And not only will it bless the life of your family, it will improve the community in which you live. Grateful people change the world! During this joyous season determine to liberate the wealth of personal power that resides in a grateful heart!